And Baby Makes 4!

I can't believe the time has come! Tomorrow we will be welcoming our baby girl! My pregnancy with Mac was relatively uneventful and without complications, but seemed to drag on at the end. We have truly been blessed again to have such a healthy pregnancy with Ellie as well. While the ride here has been much more uncomfortable,it has flown by in what seems like the blink of an eye. And honestly, I really should not complain. Basically, instead of having 9 months of complete joy and pain free bliss like we did with Mac, I got to experience the normal aches and pains that almost every other pregnant woman faces. Even though I am writing this with a grimmace on my face thanks to the heartburn and leg cramps that have me awake at 2 am, I really have no room to complain. I have had so many friends who have spent a good portion of their pregnancies stuck in a bed, thankful for each and every extra day that their little one remains inside of their bodies to grow. I will gladly take the sleepless nights and rib poking I have grown accustomed to. And lets be honest, we are all so excited to be done with a pregnancy, only to quickly realize that we miss the comforting feeling of our baby moving around and of course playing the game "Guess Which Body This Is." I know I've complained this time around, but I just want everyone to know that I am beyond grateful to get to experience this not once, but twice.
As the clock is literally winding down, I have such a mix of emotions running through my mind. Honestly, up until today, my biggest stressor was getting the house ready, having bags packed, and just having "stuff" done. Now that it's all taken care of (with about 32 hours to spare), I have shifted my full and complete attention to Mac. Don't get me wrong, I have spent many many hours thinking about how all this is going to affect him, but now it's all I'm thinking about. Obviously, lots of people have 2 or more kids, but it's a first for me. This past week I have seen a change in Mac's temperment. He obviously senses that something is happening. We talk to him about Ellie all the time and he is VERY excited that the time is approaching for him to receive his Big Brother train, but it's just going to be very different for him once she is actually here. All of this makes me a little sad. I love getting to spend each and every day with my sweet little guy and now there's just not going to be as much time to devote soley to him. Breastfeeding was not a success for me the last time and I am really hoping to be able to master it this time around which is just another huge block of time that will be taken away from time I could have with Mac. Mommy guilt has already begun to rear it's ugly headA little bit of guilt is already starting to set in and she's not even here yet! I know it will all work out and Mac will adapt to our new family dynamic, but in the mean time it may be a little bumpy. My goal through all of this, even though we will ahve people staying at the house for a few weeks, is to keep everything as normal as possible for him.